How do you keep hope alive?
I feel like I am going through the motions with this cycle. Wake up, take shot..wake up take shot. I am not even excited to see how many follies I have tomorrow. Because how many follies I have does not mean squat, really.
I thought the change in RE would give me some hope and it did at first, but now I am not feeling hopeful at all. I am almost living in a constant anxiety attack state where I can not catch my breath, I feel sick to my stomach. I'm afraid of hoping because I am afraid to be crushed in the end.
I would like to say this cycle is different, but what is different really? It is still me crappy body producing crappy eggs. Change of scenery does not change that.
Blah
1 comment:
Argghhhh! I know all too well those familiar pangs of fear that can steal from us any newfound hope we find along the way...faith is continuing to go forward anyway...I am glad you can get it out here, with those that understand.
sending you peace, hope for freedom from the past and lots of good news at your apt. today!!!
xox
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