I got the frozen embryo report in the mail yesterday. I remember being so excited when I saw it in the mail box, that seems like such a distant memory. Ever since I did open it and read that no embryos made it I have been in a huge funk.
I am tired of crying. I am tired of being let down. I have already given up on this cycle. I am doubting that the 2 embryos inside me are still alive. I doubt I will ever be pregnant. I fear that I will never be a mother. Why me why?
I am angry and I am hurt - crushed! Mad - bitter - pissed off at the world, at myself, at my body. At everyone around med who has what I want. At everyone who will eventually get what I want as I sit on the sidelines and wonder, why are they better then me? Why God WHY?
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2 comments:
I am so sorry for your news. I really hope this cycle is "it" for you. Try and keep your spirits up - easier said than done, I know :)
((Hugs)) sweetie.
I actually just welled up...I am so sorry I feel so bad for you...and for all those in our situtation...its such a sucky thing...and we can only understand your pain.
Please try and remember we are all here for you and know how you feel. I hope things do get better and that you get a surprise that those 2 inside you are the most important are the ones that will bring you joy very shortly!
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