Belly pics

12 weeks, sporting bloat. - 15 weeks - 17 weeks (almost 18)

Ignore the faces and the humidity frizz of my hair LOL.

What was that?

Yesterday I woke at my usual 6 am. Not sure why I can't sleep more then 6 hours, but it is my new routine. A normal morning: pee, let dog out, make coffee, take my synthroid, log onto computer, check the nest-bump, let dog in, play a few games, H wakes up, spend some time with him before I kiss him off to work... Play a few more games. Pee - spot of blood! PANIC. Not.Normal.

My heart raced. Should I call in sick? No breathe Krissy, breathe. Check again. Nothing. Okay all is right. Is it? Check 100 more times in the next hour. No blood. Okay it is okay. Get ready for work, checking again in between doing every routine task. Nothing. Phew. Go to work. Continue checking every 10 minutes. Stretching pains in uterus. Panic. No it is alright. Right? Breathe.

I haven't had anything since, on and off stretching pains on my right side near the belly button. Nothing that has me hunched over in pain, I think normal stretching, but after seeing a spot of blood, nothing is "normal", you over annualized everything. No more blood since? So what was that. I have a yeast infection, so maybe I irritated it?

I am not going to call the doctor, the last bleeding scare I had she told me that it would be possible to have more spotting and not to worry unless it was heavier then before. Well, it was way lighter, so why am I freaking out? I have my big u/s in less then 2 weeks. I can make it. Come on little one, I need one of your thumps more then ever!

Thumpity thump thump!

Friday for the first time, I felt this thump in my uterus, or at least low in my abdomen, which I would think is my ute. At the time I didn't think anything of it, more stretching of the uterus maybe? Then yesterday I felt it again. Thump - Thumpity - Thump. It made me pause. Is that you little one?

People say you sometimes can feel the baby move starting at 15 weeks, but usually with your first you don't "know" it IS actually the baby. Well, I have grown accustomed to searching for things to feel different, and this most definitely felt like nothing I have ever felt before. Thump. Even if it is not the baby, it is now! I have felt stretching, I have felt light menstrual cramps, never ever a thump though!

So here I am not as I type this hoping to feel that thump again. Come on little one, if that was you thump again!

Update on father in law

Things have been status quo on the pregnancy front. I feel good, but always have really, except for the occasional heartburn. I wish I could say the same for my father in law, unfortunately I can't though.

He has been in the hospital/rehab for 4 months now, went in a week before we got our ET. I went to see him last Saturday and they were teaching him how to speak while on a ventilator, he was so proud that he could say "hi" and was in really high spirits. He felt my tummy (the only person I would allow to touch it) and when I left he had a huge smile. He is just so proud and excited for his first grandchild.

Then Wednesday he took a turn for the worse. He started to hallucinate, the doctor thought it was because of a sleeping pill they had given him. Then in the next couple of days he became unresponsive. They transferred him to a hospital and ran all the usual tests. He had an infection, thought because of one of his various tubes. Turns out he is septic and his blood pressure is frighteningly low. The doctors said they are doing everything they can, but things do not look good and basically said that if his blood pressure does to rise, he may have a week at most.

He has been a miracle since the day they brought him in, originally they told us he was brain dead. He proved them wrong time and again. This time, though, I am afraid we are all out of miracles. I pray that I am wrong, like I was before.

I am devastated for my husband, his father was the one who kept his family together (his mom can be a bit of a nut case - to put it mildly). I wanted him to meet his grandchild, and with each miracle I started to believe he would. We find out the sex in 2 weeks and I don't want my husband to be going through this right now, it is supposed to be a happy time, but it is not. I am devastated for him and I wish there was more I could do then just vent about it.

So once again I am soliciting prayer, they have worked before. Hoping God has it in him to answer them one more time.

I'm still bitter

I guess a nasty side effect to infertility, that may never wear off is the bitterness that comes along with it. I thought I would grow past this once I got the BFP but now that I am pregnant I still feel the pangs.

I feel those pangs when I listen to girls who get pregnant "naturally" talk about their second and possible third children and how they plan on spacing it apart just right. Angry at mothers who are carrying their second and do have that perfect space apart. Angry that I will never have that. Angry that I am even thinking past this one on to another one, because I know there may never be another. Forget about the "oopsies"!

I remember reading about m/c on the 1st tri board and how hopeful those women who were suffering were about return "shortly". There would be no hope for me if something horrible like that happened. Of course no one should suffer that pain, but what a different pain to feel knowing you may have a shot at returning "shortly"

I hate feeling like this and wonder if it will ever go away. Will I ever return to the old Krissy? I want her back!

If I hear (fill in the blank) one more time!

So we have been "out" for about a week now, I always remember hearing and reading about all the pregnancy questions pregnant women would get asked constantly. I never realized how truly annoying it is though.

I work in a bar, one filled with regulars so I see the same people, with the exception of maybe one or two, every Saturday night. Saturday is my busiest night, with probably give or take 100 people coming in and out all night long. So you repeat the How are you feeling? Are you finding out the sex? Do you have morning sickness? When are you due? and my personal favorite - Are you sure there isn't two in there? Multiply all of those questions by 100 and by the end of the night, you want to start wearing it on a sign around your neck. I remember seeing t-shirts on Cafe Press listing all the answers to some of these questions and I am really thinking of getting one! Really!

What is really sweet is that I have a group of three customers. Women in their 60's who are giving me an extra dollar a week and made me swear to start a "baby jar" so I can deposit this extra money a week in the kitty for the baby. They made it very clear that this was not my tip money, but the babies money. Besides opening beers for these ladies, I do not know them well, so this gesture is very sweet. They started it last week, but really I thought that it was a one week thing. They are serious about it and they are trying to recruit other customers in on the deal too! So I came home last night, exhausted from answering way too may questions and dug out a vase to start the kitty. I think I may go out and buy one of those cute piggy banks. My son or daughters first piggy bank!

It is a good day!

First, the sun has been shining for two days in a row. I think a new record for this horrible "summer". I can not believe it is a week until July 4th, my mothers pool has been open for over a month and there just have been no good days to use it in, hopefully the weather will warm now?

Next I have a doctors appointment - a second trimester appointment! I am looking forward to hearing my little one's heart beating for the first time. Another huge milestone.

Also, for the past week I have really gotten into this being pregnant thing, the paranoia has settled down a ton. I actually believe in 6 short months I will be carrying home my real live baby. I have been reading Baby Bargains and making lists of all the things I will need to register for. Incredible. It took me long enough to settle into the belief that good things do happen, and I love being here and feeling secure.

I feel wonderful. I can not believe this is pregnancy! No morning sickness. No sore breast - no growing breast either, something I wanted, but will live without I guess. I just feel like I felt 5 months ago - even better without all the drugs for IVF I had been taking. I increased my eating, portion size but I am not starving like I expected. I just load my plate and usually clean it off. I gained about 5 pounds already.

I also have a baby belly. People at work are noticing it and of course pointing it out to me, like I do not already know it is there. I am glad it is though, because honestly it is the only tangible thing that is reminding me I am pregnant.

I keep thinking that since the first trimester was so easy I am doomed for a 36 hour labor or something. Or maybe it is giving me reprieve because I had to go through so much to get here? Either way, I am just HAPPY!

And the moment you have been waiting for (or maybe not) - the first belly pic taken at 13 weeks. Sorry for the blurriness, they all came out like that and I can not figure out why. Maybe something is set wrong on my camera, but I am technologically challenged so need Scott to look at it later for me.


I just realized how scary this picture looks. I need to start wearing cute clothes when taking these pics. The weather here has been crappy, my jeans are not comfy at all so I spend my days off in sweats. I need to buy maternity jeans - next thing on my list!